


They got the devil in 'em.

by 71TeenIdles



Category: Daredevil (TV), Jessica Jones (TV), Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), Spider-Man - All Media Types, The Defenders (Marvel TV)
Genre: BAMF Jessica Jones, BAMF Matt Murdock, BAMF Michelle Jones, Canon Disabled Character, Dead Aunt May, Human Disaster Jessica Jones, Matt and Jess are peters parents, Minor Character Death, Minor Irondad, Other, Peter Jones Murdock - Freeform, The Defenders (Marvel TV) Spoilers, Vannessa and Peter have a heart to heart, devildad, disaster family, spiderson, supermom - Freeform, they're trying
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-14
Updated: 2020-09-26
Packaged: 2021-02-26 00:20:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21794440
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/71TeenIdles/pseuds/71TeenIdles
Summary: Murdock boys have the devil in them.and Matthew Murdock was supposed to be the last, he was supposed to be the end of the bloodline.until Peter.((also known as I really want a devildad, supermom and spiderson crossover goddamn it. oh and please read the tags if you don't want to be surprised.))
Relationships: Jessica Jones & Matt Murdock, Luke Cage & Jessica Jones & Matt Murdock & Danny Rand, Matt Murdock & Claire Temple, Matt Murdock & Franklin "Foggy" Nelson, Matt Murdock & Karen Page, Matt Murdock & Peter Parker, Vanessa Marianna Fisk/Wilson Fisk
Comments: 30
Kudos: 269





	1. Introduction.

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [maybe he is born of grit and hellfire](https://archiveofourown.org/works/19838200) by [aw marvel no (getoffmysheets)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/getoffmysheets/pseuds/aw%20marvel%20no). 



> this work was inspired by a work called, 'maybe he's born of grit and hellfire' which I cant find. like it disappeared.
> 
> also, I need more works like this.

It started with a phone call, the automated voice rung out an unfamiliar number the blind man in his bed.  
Matthew Murdock answered with his grace and poise.  
And hung up with haste and cowardice. 

And when the phone call turned into a visit to the building, Matthew Murdock was a coward. 

Another Murdock boy, 14 years old. His heartbeat with only the fever and strength of someone with anger and Matt preyed ‘god no’. 

And in his voice, his anger and the devil inside him he promised his father, battlin’ Jack; that he’d do it different. That it would not hurt him, that it would stay inside. 

Because those Murdock boys,

They got the devil in ‘em.


	2. Matt Murdock (introduction)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter meets Matt and Margret.  
> they get along well.
> 
> (slight self-loathing themes.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> no. I don't know how old Matt would have been when Peter was born, shhhhhhhh. we don't talk about it.

Peter had seen many strange phenomenons, but he’d always gotten over them. Like when MJ had shown up to school nervous and told him and Ned that she was asexual. He’d never expect it, but he got over it. Or like how aunt May used to insist on cooking when she knew it was garbage he got over that too. 

But the weirdest one was that he never looked like any of the other parkers. His chin never looked like any of the families and his hair, when showed in the right lighting, had an auburn hue to it. Or how his eyes seemed to look a little on the green side, when -again- not any one of the parkers had them. ( it didn’t help that ned sung Jolene at him when he told him this.) 

But he never really cared, May and Ben always took care of him, told him he was still his mother and father’s child and that they were sure that Parkers had those genes far back, that it must have skipped mom and pops. (a simple look into an old family album showed that it wasn’t true. But Peter didn’t wanna hurt them) 

But they’re gone. 

So he sat in a cold building, with scared children and stone-faced (abusive no doubt) parents. And everything seemed so loud, so vibrant. He gripped the plastic chair and felt it bend under his hands. Something was tapping on the ground with a slight rhythm, and he found it seemed to ground him. Then a lady came up to him, with a smile laced with pity, and told him, with a softness that only reminded him of May. (the chair was starting to crack.) 

“Hey, this is gonna be a little hard to hear, are you ready.”

he nodded.

“We found your birth father, he’s gonna decide if he wants to keep you, we’ve been informed that your birth mother is still alive as well, you may even meet her!”

His birth father, and mother. No that couldn’t be right, he was a parker, through and through. ‘But it would make sense, maybe he has red hair.’ ‘yeah come on Peter maybe he’ll want you!’ 

‘God I sure hope so.’ ‘what if he won’t, everyone around you dies Peter.’ ‘that’s no-’

“Sweetie, can you hear me?” 

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Okay, Peter, follow me.”

She turned into the brightly lit conference room and opened the door. 

The man inside wore a nice gray suit and red sunglasses, ‘who wears sunglasses indoors.” then he saw the white cane, his bruised knuckles pailing and clutching it. 

‘He’s blind, great going Peter.’

“Come on, sit down with us.” 

“No.”

“Alright that’s okay, you don’t need to. This is Matt Murdock, Mr.Murdock this is peter parker, well I guess he’s a Murdock huh!” she said cheerfully. 

Peter grasped the wall, feeling the dents cave in and his fingertips stick to the craters. 

He observed him closer, he tilted his head and the light caught Murdock’s hair. 

Red. 

“Are you married to my birth mother?” 

“No. We’re good friends.”

“I was an accident.” 

“Yes, you were.” 

The room went silent and the worker stood up. 

“I’ll let you two talk.” 

The door closed and peter unlatched the wall.

He started pacing, so many questions running in his head.

“Why didn’t She keep me?” 

“She was coerced into giving you away.” 

Peter laughed, ‘coerced into giving me away, fuck peter no one wants you.’

“Just leave me in foster care, or an orphanage, I don’t care.”

“I think you do Peter.” 

He froze, of course, he cared, they’re dead, they're all dead and god peter, you could have done something about it, you could have broken the gun with your bare hands, look what happened when you-- isn't this is your fault peter? Come on _einstein_ you know the answer. 

Everything was getting louder, brighter, and more sensitive everything faded and came into focus. Like a flicker of light, or pulses. 

God peter what have you done? What have you done? What have you done? What have you don- 

“Peter.” 

Stop it-- can-- grea---- Powe----- res---

“Peter.”

Something hit his legs, w-was that Murdocks cane? 

Okay, ow that kinda hurt.

“Peter, focus on the tapping.”

Okay, that isn't so bad, just some tapping. Huh, that’s actually kinda nice. 

Okay, just calm down. Yeah, this is okay.

Peters breathing calmed down 

“Thank you Mr.Murdock.”

The blind man shuffled his feet and held his cane against his chest.

“I don’t have a room set up, neither does your mother. the Saint Agnes Orphanage is where you’ll stay for as long as it takes for us to set something up, your grandmother is a nun there.”

Peter nodded, this was all so much, all this new information he had to take in. he hadn’t collected anything from the apartment, yet. 

“I need clothes.” 

“I know, we’ll stop on the way there, then I’ll drop you off.”

“Okay, I can do that.” 

* * *

He took a shower, and ditched the clothes he was wearing, he hated the fact that there was so much blood on them, on him. 

How their blood is literally on his hands (it's funny in an absurd way.) 

And he packs his clothes in a duffle bag and he looks at his favorite notebook. 

SPIDER-MAN

He laughs, how naive he was just 4 hours ago. To think he could do something like Daredevil, or Jessica Jones. He’s an idiot. Only now, he's a super-powered idiot with no one left. 

And a voice seems to say ‘you have Mr.Murdock and your mother.’

‘How could you be so dumb? Once they realize how disgusting you are they’ll cart you off to the highest bidder! Peter just run! You don't have to live like this!’

Would running be any better, he’d struggle with himself just like he’s doing now. But he wouldn't have a place to stay.

‘So just be grateful he even likes you.’

“Peter, are you ready to go?”  
  


_‘No! I wanna stay, I don’t wanna go! Please BEN, MAY!’_

“Yes, Mr.Murdock.”

“Just matt is fine.” 

And Peter turned around, leaving whatever remains of his childhood in the grey, cold, old apartment of the Parkers. 

* * *

Peter didn’t mind Saint Agnes. the room was cold, but it didn’t feel like a prison. 

The wood cross on the wall felt warm. 

But there was only one thing he could feel in the warm grey walls of his room; anger. 

Everything burned and spread through his body like fire. Like hell. 

And maggie would bend down close to him and hug him. 

He stuffed his anger deep down inside him. But one morning when he woke up and walked to maggie, who hugged him tight and sat him down. 

“I think I should tell you something they used to say about the Murdock boys.”

“What is it, Sister Maggie?”

He had warmed up to her, she was kind yet stern and nothing like Mary or May because she wasn’t a Parker. She was a Murdock.

“Be careful of those Murdock boys, they got the devil in ‘em that's what they used to say, Now, Peter, I know you aren’t a religious young man, but you should understand.” 

“I don’t think I do.”

“I think when Matthew comes back with a plan you should ask.” 

“Thank you, Sister Maggie.” 

Matthew Murdock came back in a week. With a small smile as he saw Peter in the chapel bench with his head in his hands. 

Matt waited for him to finish whatever he was doing (he hoped preying but he couldn’t assume Peter was catholic) to approach him. 

“Peter, I have a room sorted for you.” 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> did you like it? let me know and follow my twitter and Tumblr (71teenidles) for updates.


	3. Runs in the Family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter meets his mother.  
> and learns more about himself and his parents.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it took a long time to get this out and I'm so sorry for that. but it's here!  
> I'm really proud of this, and feel like I wrote the characters really well!  
> if I get anything wrong about the layout of jesses apartment, that's because I only watched about 4 episodes of her tv show, Sorry!
> 
> the song mentioned in the title and in the chapter is Runs in the family by Amanda Palmer.

Peter looked up, hope shining in his almost green eyes.

“Where?” he asked.

Matt can hear peters’ happiness and it makes him grin, not like the devil grin, but something with happier tones to it. 

“It’s at my apartment, I needed to get a bed for you.” 

Peter nods and thanks him.

Just when Peter thinks the conversation is over, Matt talks again.

“When you settle in, we’ll be visiting your mother. She’s excited to see you again.” 

Peter let his hands unfold as he stood up. 

“As much as I like this place, I need to leave.” 

He tried for a small smile.

Matt heard his heart speed up, his adrenaline spiking.

Anger. 

“Why is that?” Matt can hear his own heart speed up.

Peter clenches his fists, nails digging into his palms feeling his heartbeat at a fast pace.

“I can’t explain.”

Peter tries to breathe when he’s picking up the clothes scattered around his room. 

Everything hurts and all the anger he’s tried so hard to repress comes back in harsh waves. 

He stands up, shaking as everything builds up and up. He presses his hands in fists and doesn’t feel anything when his nails pierce the skin.

He lets out a growl that’s almost animalistic 

Before everything can come boiling over he looks up at the cross on the wall, he’s reminded of Matt.

‘He wouldn’t want a kid with anger problems, just be happy.’

He shoves all of his anger down, burying it with the same anger he felt when his parents died.

* * *

Matt and Peter walk hand in hand across the streets. Taking sharp turns and Peter tugging Matt when he seems wildly out of step, almost accentuating his blindness. 

Finally, they reach the apartment building.

“Do you need me to open the door?” 

Matt grins and slots the key perfectly in the hole. “Peter you’ll find your mother and I can do things normal people can’t.” 

Matt felt Peters’s heart jump. 

Matt swings the door open to reveal the apartment, the sun-light coming from the large living room window is warm. But Peter looks more focused on the large billboard as the main source of light. 

“Your room has blackout curtains, I’ve been told the light affects the whole apartment.”

Matt's eyebrows lifted with sympathy. 

Peter just smiled, “that’s okay.”

Peters’s heartbeat told differently, he still had adrenalin flooding his veins, something akin to anger but that leaned more towards fear and nervousness. 

“Follow me, I’ll show you your room.”

Peter put his arm in his and they walked across the living room to the room beside Matts. 

“Please get comfortable, we can leave to meet your mother anytime.” 

Matt left the room shutting the door and feeling his heartbreak at the choked sounds of his son crying. 

* * *

The room was nice, but Peter still mourned, covered his sobs with his hands and struggled with his phone, tears making his thumbs slide across the screen in a hasty effort to text ned. 

_“Won’t be at school, robbery ben and mey.’_

_‘may****’_

He tidies up his room, tangling and untangling his earbuds. 

He sits on the sheets that feel so soft he can only think its silk, the bedframe feels strong but he feels like if he pressed on the supports it would break, everything feels so fragile and he’s already been too close to breaking his phone. 

It starts getting dark and he figures its time, he walks out of the room to see matt waiting patiently on the couch. 

“Are you ready?”

Peter stiffens, breathing deep, he puts one earbud in and shuffle plays his playlists. 

_**'My friend has problems with winter and autumn.'** _

Perfect, he rolls his eyes. He looks back to Matt already putting on a coat. 

“Come on.” 

The streets were almost completely dark. 

They walked into a shady apartment and Peters about 37% sure there’s a crackhead living there with his mother. 

They stop at the end of the hallway, facing a door with a broken window, the words faded and chipped seem to say. 

_‘Alias investigations.’_

“She works in law enforcement?”

“Something like that.”

Matt slid his hands on the door, finding the knob and turning it to reveal the broken lock.

Matt grins and calls out.

“Jess! You need a new lock!” 

They walk in and see the desk and couch in the living/office area. 

It's surprisingly clean save for the trash bags. 

“Doing a little spring cleaning?” 

He calls to the seemingly empty apartment. 

Something in the back of Peter's head starts tingling, ringing and starts screaming at him. 

Then he sidesteps, where a door would have hit him 1 second too late. 

“Shut the hell up Murdock I just wanna see…” 

They’re about the same height and the room is faced with silence as Peter and the woman named Jess meet eyes. 

“Peter?” 

She murmurs almost too quietly for a normal person to hear.

“The one and only, turns out I’m not an orphan huh?” 

He awkwardly shoots finger guns at her. 

She slams the door, bits of ceiling fall and the wood splinters. 

Jessica breathes harshly, and Peter flinches at how loudly her heartbeat is. 

Slamming against her ribs and echoing through her body. 

She stands still, examining him. 

“Hey, I’m Jessica jones.” 

Peter smiles. 

“Yeah, uh I followed the killgrave story a while back.” 

He chuckles.

“The irony of this situation is not lost on me.” 

He twiddles his hands, feeling his fingers rub against the sandpaper-like texture of his hands and cringing, it feels so sharp. 

Jessica tilts her head, “irony?” 

“Well, I had to get some weird traits from you?” 

He shakes his head. 

‘Really peter? Oh my god please don’t. This actually can't be how you tell them!’

A small buzzing spread through his brain again. 

‘Coming from behind you.’

The buzzing was right as less than 2 seconds later he felt Matts hand on his shoulder.

He brushed Matt's hand with his, feeling his father's whole body shake. Peter knew he felt the sharpness of his palm. 

“I brought food, I tried to make dinner.” 

Jessica tries for a small smile, eyebrows turning upwards when she glances at matt. 

“I’m sure we can stay, what did you make?” 

Matt says with a smile, keeping a comforting hand on Peters’s shoulder. 

“Tried to make.”

She says as they move 

“I just ended up putting queso over some chips,

Impromptu nachos!” 

They all follow to the small round table with a pile of nachos stacked on 3 plates.

Matt takes the left seat to the wall and jess takes the right.

Leaving peter to sit between them facing the wall. 

They start eating in a comfortable environment. 

Until the buzzing starts again.

Dull but still whispering. ‘Falling’ it says. 

Then jess knocks over her glass.

Peter without thinking leans to the right and catches the glass before it can shatter, already giving up on trying to prevent the inch that spills out. 

He takes the glass and puts it back next to Jess. 

“Sorry I couldn't stop it from spilling.” 

He whimpers. 

Jess swallows her nachos and shrugs, 

“It's alright kid.”

Matt smiles fondly 

“Nice catch.” 

That gets a small laugh out of the whole table. 

About 15 minutes in, jess speaks up. 

“Okay kid, tell us about yourself.”

Peter starts thinking. Rapping his fingers in a steady rhythm on the table. 

Then he knows what to say.

“I like engineering, biomechanics as well as the use of um, prosthetics. I'm working on an interactive AI system, that I think could help with a lot of things…” 

  
  


Peter expects them to roll their eyes, or just not care. But they do. Jess and Matt look proud. Happy even. 

“What about your friends? School?” 

Matt asks. 

This time it barely takes any time for Peter to start talking. 

“I have one friend! Well, two but she doesn’t really count, because she keeps saying she's not my friend.” 

He kinda rambles. But that doesn’t matter because they’re still looking at him nodding, well Jess is. But Matt has his head in the general direction.

“The first one’s Ned, he’s been my friend for so long. And actually helped me get the base code I needed for the AI I’ve been working on, he’s always kinda been my guy in the chair, y’know?” 

Matt and Jess nod. 

“Kinda like a partner in crime huh kid?” Jess asks. 

“Yeah! Well, I don’t think anything we’ve done is actually-”

Peter frowns

“you know what I take that back.” 

That gets a laugh out of them.

“And then there’s MJ, she’s really cool. And brave! He actually came out to us about a month ago as asexual, I really admire that.”

He puts his head in one palm, pausing to crunch on the nachos. 

“These are really good by the way!” 

He smiles. 

And Matt reaches out waving his hand a bit before finding his hair and ruffling it.

“Glad you think so.” 

Jess gives him a look.

“Look, kid, I’m not gonna be the best mom, I’ve never done this before.”  
She sighs 

“I’m not gonna be the next, mary, or uh.”

Fury starts up in Peter again, lighting every nerve aflame like firecrackers 

As he grips the table. 

“May. her name was may.”

He grits his teeth and under the weight of his hand, the metal bends. 

Letting out a horrible creaking sound as the plates and cups slide to accommodate the tilt. 

“Shit! I’m so sorry, I don’t know what came over me. I swear I didn't mean to!” 

Peter breathes heavily, holding one hand to his mouth. 

Peter can hear Matt and Jesses heartbeat speed up. 

Jess gets out of her seat to fix the bend on the right side of the table. 

“Hey, it’s okay I do stuff like this all the time.” 

Her heartbeat slows and she's completely calm. 

Peter can tell she’s not lying. 

“Still I’m so sorry I never meant to bend it! I didn’t know I could do that!” 

He starts to calm down when he can feel Matt's hand on his left shoulder. 

Peter hears the metal creak again as jess pushes it up into place, sliding the dishes into the right places again.

Jess brushes her hands off as she sits back down and looks at the once full tray of nachos in the center of the table.

“We’ll talk about this later.” she shrugs and goes to pull out a wine glass and wine from the cabinets. 

“Jess.” 

Matt says with a stone-cold voice. 

“Relax Murdock I’m being fancy here.”

Jess rolls her eyes and winks at peter.

Instantly he feels better. 

* * *

The rest of the night goes well, it’s more talk about what his parents do and now Peter lays tired on his bed. 

His playlist has come to a full loop.

Lulling him to sleep with the song that started the night, humming in his ear.

_**‘I say it runs in the family’** _

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not sure if I should keep FTM MJ please let me know.  
> (EDIT MJ is no longer trans by vote of the people, and me. but shes now asexual because they deserve representation.) 
> 
> make sure to leave comments and kudos as they keep me motivated!
> 
> Tumblr: https://71teenidles.tumblr.com/


	4. Wall crawling, city sounds, and parenting doubts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter shows the parental units what exactly he can do.  
> Matt can't do this alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this story won't have spider-man slapped in the middle of it.  
> this is about the creation of spider-man, the trials and tribulations.  
> what makes peter jack-phillip parker who he is.  
> he won't face problems exactly like spider-man.  
> he's gonna face them like Peter.
> 
> yes, it will have the avengers, yes there is the main plotline that has yet to start.  
> because it's dark and I want to write fluffy filler stuff before that.

Peter woke up the next morning in his darkroom, with a simple red and blue lava lamps slight glow in the mostly dark room, still, through the blackout curtains, he could feel the sunlight. 

His eyesight faded in and out as he brought himself to wake up. 

He reached for his phone, panicking for a small second as his earbud cords caught themselves on peter’s neck. 

_ ‘Oh god, this is it. This is how I die.’  _

He briefly thought before gaining enough consciousness for him to untangle himself. He then grabbed his phone and checked the time. 

‘1:37 PM’ 

‘Time to get up I guess.’ he thought.

He struggled to pull up his sweatpants, (so classically hello kitty his favorite) and pull over his ‘I survived my trip to New York’ tee shirt. Which, he found hilarious as a resident New yorker. 

He shoved his phone in his pocket and placed one earbud in his right ear.

Then took a moment to clear out his nose and was swamped with the smell of eggs and basil. It surprised him, it wasn’t fresh, maybe made about an hour ago maybe two? 

He tries not to think about it. About how his nose seemed so sharp, as well as his hearing. 

_ Ben! Ben! Can you hear that! Ben Parker leaned over to pick up the small child. “I can’t hear anything sport. It’s as quiet as a mouse,” he said looking back to his book. _ _“NO! Ben! The neighbors are really loud! I can hear them screaming!” Ben Parker sighed and shut his book. “If the neighbors were screaming, I’d hear them.” “Why don't you-_ -

Peter shook his head. Trying not to think about the anger he felt that day. 

‘Why didn’t they believe me.’ 

‘Relax peter. You were overreacting.’ 

He scratched the back of his hand, feeling the raised marks.

He opened the door and stepped into the living space, surprised by jess and matt sitting on the couch talking. Jess had a cup of coffee in her hands and Matt was 

skimming his hands over something in braille. Then the two looked over to the tired teen. 

“Christ, when I read teenagers slept in, I didn’t know it meant me on a Saturday.” jess said, rolling her eyes. 

“Be nice Jess.”   
  


“I smell eggs where is it?” Peter asked 

Jess set down her mug. 

“Kid we ate that about 2 hours ago, I didn’t even know the room still smelled like it.” 

He frowned

“Oh, um I knew it was old. I just thought-”

“It’s fine Peter, I was like that at your age.” 

Matt smiles his lopsided smile and says. 

“This is actually on the topic of what we wanted to talk to you about.”

Peter flinched, his parent’s heartbeats pumping a bit harder, a sharp better sent hit the air, and he could only guess they were nervous. 

“W-what do you mean?” 

Jessica sighed, “Look, we think you might have gotten some mutations from us.”   
Peter licked his seemingly drying lips. 

“Like what?”

“Like bending the table-’

_ the clanking of the falling doorknob could be heard clattering through the apartment, the small child covered his mouth with his hands as he stared at the crumpled piece of metal by his feet. That wasn’t him, the buildings old, real old.- _

“I’m sorry.”

He says, distressed.

“Peter please sit down.” 

Matt said, his heartbeat slowing down.

Peter moved to sit on the chair next to Jessicas.

Nervously playing with his hands, feeling the rough texture of his palms and the raised bumps on the back of his right hand. 

“Look kid…” jess started. 

“You know I have super strength right? Its been in papers sometimes, maybe on the news.” 

Peter nods. 

“Right, I think you may have gotten that from me, is there any time you showed that?”

Peter thinks. 

_ ”What the hell happened here?!?!- _

“Yeah, I broke a doorknob when I was 10, I uh. I didn’t mean to, I was just really angry.” 

He hums a little to comfort himself and looks to Jess, who has an impartial look. But her heartbeat tells she's scared. 

After a beat, Matt spoke.

“I wasn’t always blind.” matt said

“It happened in an accident with a chemical spill, it blinded me. But also sharpened my other senses.” his unfocused irises continued to point somewhere towards the TV on the wall. 

Peter exhaled.

“So, like superpowers?” 

Matt laughed while shaking his head, and Jessica just rolled her eyes with a smile.

“Sure, like superpowers.”

The apartment went silent. 

“I guess…” Peter cut himself off before starting again. “I guess now is the best time to tell you two, being my... Uh, parents,” he said with a meek smile. 

Jess and Matt followed with their own odds and small smiles. 

“I, uh. I can hear your heartbeats… and smells are really sharp, I think. Maybe I got that from matt.” 

Matthew nodded. Wringing his wrists. 

“Then, something happened a few weeks ago… before the robbery.” 

They fell silent. Jessica sighed before running her fingers through her hair. 

“I, I don’t really think I can explain, just. Show you.”

“Yeah, yeah okay do that.” jess waved her hand. 

Peter stood up, slowly unlacing his shoes to the quite confusion of his parents. 

He walked over to the wall, rubbing his hands together and breathing deeply.

Then he scaled the wall, he just closed his eyes. 

Breathing deeply.

Then he found himself on the ceiling.

“Oh my god. Mathew!” 

“Wh-what?”

_“YOUR SON IS ON THE GODDAMN CEILING!”_

Jessica screamed, putting her hand on her forehead and breathing heavily. 

“W-what he’s your son too!” 

“GUYS! Don’t freak out! If you freak out I freak out and then I’ll fall!” 

He detached one of his hands and waved it around.

_“PETER PARKER GET DOWN FROM THE CEILING!”_

Matt shouted.

“I don’t know-how…” 

Peter muttered…

Jessica blinked a few times and raised her eyebrows.

“What.” 

Peter flushed, “I don’t know how to get down.” he paused.

“I mean I could flip down,” 

He shrugged. 

Matt swore. 

“NO! No no no, get down safely!” 

“Uh” 

Peter muttered.

The room was silent as he contemplated how to get down.

So he flipped. 

Rocketing off the ceiling, hearing the thick **snap** of his earbud cords as his phone fell out of his pocket. 

He figured that didn't matter.

But he landed, the adrenaline rushed to his brain when he stumbled. 

He grinned. Panting. 

“See, I’m fine!” 

“...God Matthew, he’s like you.” 

* * *

  
  


The desk in peters’ room was messy, his computer gave off an eerie tint to his room, changing colors. There were papers, scribbled with addresses and names. All crossed out, except for one. 

Flint Marko.

Flint Marko.

Flint Marko. 

Repeated over and over.

Peter tried not to think about them in the 5 weeks he’s been in his father’s apartment,

He tried not to think about it tonight.

  
  


Peter was meant to be sleeping. 

He tossed and turned. Clenching his eyes shut and covering his ears with his hands.

He heard the cries of people, yelling. And sirens. Usually, he had his music, something to focus on. But there was too much ruckus. and for the first time in his life. He heard just how many cries and sirens for help there were.

**“Hey! Hey, help! Help me! Someone please!”**

Matt was in the small kitchen, Jess had taken off to work on a case, (though he should have been helping on one at Nelson, Murdock & page.) so he’d taken to drinking a cup of tea and focusing around Josies’ and the clamber and general noise inside and outside the bar, the day had been peaceful except for the ceiling stunt that Peter had  pulled earlier. Matt's head still swam with the information about his son’s powers, he worried about his future and hoped it wouldn’t affect whatever he wanted to do.

His prayers were interrupted by the sharp smell of fear.

Peter was whispering 

~~ ‘I'm sorry I can't.’  ~~

Matt's unfocused eyes began to water. 

He rushed to his room. 

Sliding open the door. 

He winced at the mental image of his son paralyzed, flashing back to him in Saint Agnes. 

“Hey! Hey hey hey.” he runs over to him  Carefully prying Peters hands off his ears.  Dreading to leave him alone, he should -never- leave him alone.

“I-it hurts!”

He whined, yelled almost. Pain mixing with tears and hiccuping sobs. 

_ "It burns!" -"Matty just close your eyes" -"AGHH!" _

“I know, I know.” 

Matts eyebrows furrowed. 

Jack Murdock lingered.

‘If you had gone out tonight, you wouldn’t have been here. He would be like you.’

‘That was one time!’ he argued 

‘One time was all it took.’ 

He shook his head and focused on helping Peter, still crying and heart hammering at his lungs. 

“It’s okay! Peter, can you hear me?” 

“Nng, mhmm,” he muttered still whimpering at hands twitching trying to grab at his ears. 

Matt tried not to focus on the sharp scent of blood behind his ears. 

“Good! Okay, there’s a bar, maybe 6 blocks from here? There are a lot of people. And clinking. Try and focus on that.” 

He still clenched his son’s hands in his. 

‘You made him like this.’

‘You can't help him.’ 

‘But you know who can.’ 

‘Come on matty, don’t be a pussy.’ 

No, he wasn’t going to let Stick touch his child, manipulate him and leave him behind. 

This child didn’t need to be a soldier. didn’t need to bear the weight of the city and his conscience on his shoulders like matt. 

If anything he wanted to make sure that Peter wasn’t like him. Or jess. Never facing evils like The Hand, never knowing the world of lies that came with being a vigilante.

And never, EVER dealing with monsters like Wilson Fisk. 

But he was suffering. Not knowing how to control his powers-

“Matt!” 

Peter bolts up, a little grin on his face.

“I did it,” he whispers. 

Matt felt his eyes tear up behind his glasses.

“I- I’m sorry, usually I have music, or, or I’m talking to someone and I just. Cancel it out. I'm so sorry.” 

Matt didn’t have words, so he just hugged him. Held him tight and wished for him to never face the world like he Jess had, and god forbid as he had.  When they pried themselves out of each other’s grip,  Peter hummed, tapping his index finger on his thumb in thought. 

“Maybe if I play music out loud? But really quit so id have to focus on it to sleep?’ 

Peter mutters. 

“You’re a genius,” Matt says as he ruffles Peters’s hair. 

“Please sleep well,” 

he mutters. 

“I'll try.” 

Matt left, sighing and sliding open the door to his room and sighed settling into his sheets and falling asleep. 

* * *

Peter stood up, small, quiet. 

Then he began looking through the papers. 

Rage kept bubbling, his heart hammering.

Flint Marko. 

‘You ruined my life.’

‘You killed ben and may.’

_**‘You have it coming to you.’** _

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ooh, subplot! I have a v special plan for this!


	5. Enter: Vanessa Fisk and the attempted murder of a not so innocent man.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More time spent with Jess, and more time in Ally-ways

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so remember when the tags said Venessa Fisk and Peter have a heart to heart? welcome to that chapter, but don't worry you get a lot of fluff beforehand.

The day after seemed to be better, and the days after. 

His alarm rang, nothing too loud, just the simple beep. 

He hauled himself out of bed, to be bombarded by city smells and sounds. 

Rubbing his head and pausing the quietly playing music to get dressed. 

The room didn’t have a closet, but it did have a small dresser. (he figured the closet went to Matt's room.) he dug through his clothes to pick out a tee shirt and hoodie, hopping up and down to pull on his pants. 

He checked the weather and shoved on some fingerless wool gloves on. 

He stopped, fully dressed. He pushed his dark auburn hair out of his face. Turning to slide open the door, only to run directly into it. 

‘Oww, that hurt.’

‘Okay Peter, you just gotta go.’ 

He lost time, stressing in the kitchen. 

The good part of moving to Hell’s kitchen is it was closer to Midtown Tech than queens. And he didn’t need to take the subway, walking should do the trick. 

He hummed catching the toast as it popped out of the toaster. 

He looked at the piece of paper sitting next to the toaster with scratchy writing. 

‘At work, Jess will pick you up.’

‘Oh worm? Alright.’ he thought, munching at his crispy bread. 

He looked down at his phone. 

6:01 

‘Shit gotta go parker!’ 

He swore as he slung his backpack over his shoulders. 

He hummed down streets, providing himself with music to tune out the sounds and sirens. 

He rounded the corner to the campus and entered. 

“Peter!” the ringing in his head cleared as he heard Ned yell out his name. 

He came barreling towards him, wrapping Peter in a bone-crushing hug.

He pulled away, his hand lingering on Peters’s shoulder. 

“I heard what happened, you’re okay, right? Who are you staying with now?” 

He asked, sputtering and furrowing his eyebrows as they walked to their lockers. 

“Honestly?” he starts, opening his locker and slinging his backpack in it. 

“I don’t really know how I feel… I mean I miss them a lot. But I guess I’m just trying not to think about it. I don’t even know if they’re getting a proper funeral.” 

He looks down, collecting his books and hugging them close. 

“Crap peter…” 

Ned frowned. 

“If it helps you can stay at my place! I’ve got the new lego death star!!!” he smiles, pulling out the little Lego Palpatine with lightning attachments in its plastic hands and placing it on Peter’s shoulder. 

“I wish I could Ned my Moms picking me up.” 

“Wait, aren’t your parents dead?” 

“Apparently the Parkers are, but my birth ones aren’t. I don’t know Ned. I don’t wanna talk about it.” 

He huffed. 

“But I want that Palpatine!” 

“Why of course buddy!” 

He laughed, slinging his arm over peters’ shoulders and patting his head. 

“So what’s your dad like?” 

Ned asked. 

“Ned!” 

“Sorry Peter, I wanna know!” he laughed. 

“He’s fine, his name is Matt Murdock kinda tall. I think he’s a lawyer.” 

Peter shrugged. “I don’t know that much about him, I met my grandma on his side. She’s a nun.” 

Ned tilted his head, in no way (no way at all) that reminded Peter of a small dog. 

“A nun?” he asked. 

“Yeah I don’t know much about it.” he sighed 

“I don’t know much about my Granddad either other than he died before I was born.”

“Jesus Peter.” 

“Oh yeah, and Matts blind.”

“Oh worm?” 

Ned asked. 

“Yea.” he started, getting cut off by the bell. 

“Crap, okay Ned you gotta go.” 

He said, worming himself out of Ned’s arms, totally not focusing on the lingering warmth. 

“Okay! Gotta blast!” 

Ned said laughing as he ran to class. He felt his head ring and his face heat up when turning away. 

He then ran into the door frame of his classroom. 

“Nice going parker.” Flash snarked. 

‘Good to know today is gonna suck.’

He thought, taking out his notebooks and sitting down. 

He rested his head on his left hand and began drifting off. 

Drowning in heartbeats, picking out Neds and drifting off the gentle thrumming of it.

“Hey, loser.”

He stayed there with his eyes closed, hearing MJ sit down and slip out her books. 

“Hey MJ.” he muttered.

“I heard what happened, I think everyone did.”

She stated, straight-faced with a fast-beating heart. 

Peter sighed, he seemed to be doing that a lot. 

“Yeah, I know.” 

The day flew by, okay no it didn’t but peter would wish. It went slow. Everything flew in one ear and out the next. (thank god ned was paying attention.) 

‘Of course, he was, he’s smart.’ he hummed.

“Peter over here!” Ned called from their lockers. 

Peter ran over there, shoving his books in his backpack, cringing at the sound of tech crunching. 

“How’s Karen coming along?” Ned asked, tossing his own backpack over both his shoulders.

“After the base code, we got? Her coding is practically done! I’m still working on something to hold it at least, kinda like EVE from Wall-E y’know?”

“Peter! That would look so cool! You know I’ll always help right?” 

Ned smiled. 

“I know.” 

Peter couldn’t help but smile back, thrumming in his heart and fingers reaching out to grab his hand. 

Bum bum, bum bum, bum bum. 

A strong heartbeat. Jesses. 

“Hey, do you know where your mom is?” 

Ned asked as they walked out of the building and into the parking lot. 

Peter nodded.

“She’s over there.” he tilted his head over to where Jess was standing, seemingly blending into the brick of the alley not too far away from them. Her camera bag was slung across her chest and she gave a small two-finger salute to him, taking a sip of her coffee. 

Ned grabbed onto the peters’ sleeve with both his hands and squeaked.

“Holy shit! That’s Jessica Jones!!!” 

Peter rolled his eyes.

“Whos that?” he asked with a grin.

“Peter!” Ned whined, 

“she's only the coolest PI ever!” 

he shook Peters figure lightly

Peter laughed, “yeah and apparently the woman who birthed me, who I have to go see now, let me go!” 

He tried to pry himself from Ned’s grip. 

“But Peterrrrr!” 

“Fine.” 

Peter wrapped himself around Ned’s body and squeezed, lifting him slightly off the pavement.

Ned laughed, loud and from his stomach. And Peter listed, to everything his laugh, his heart. Relishing the fact that he was healthy. 

Then he let him go, and they went their separate ways. 

“See ya ned!” 

“Bye!”

They turned in separate directions, maybe getting 3 feet away from each other when Ned turned back around. 

“Hey peter?” he asked. 

Peter turned around, cocking his head to the side.

“Yeah?” 

Ned smiled,

“I’m glad you’re okay.” 

And so did peter.

“Yeah, me too dude.” 

6 feet later Ned got into his mother’s car, and Peter watched her drive away. 

He walked up to Jess waving. 

They started walking in sync. 

Jess sighed, taking a sip of her coffee.

“You guys are cute, Y'all dating?” 

She asked.

Peters’s face burned up a little. 

“Nah.” he shook his head. 

“We’re just best friends.” he shrugged. 

“Jesus,” she rolled her eyes, “you really are like Matt.” 

Peter stuck his tongue out at her closing his eyes, blowing a raspberry. 

Jess rolled her eyes again, this time with a little smirk as she looked away from Peter. 

* * *

Peter and Jess walked into Alias. Peter made sure to gently close the door behind them. 

Jess moved over to her desk, and looked over to the bottles of whiskey on the bookshelf across from her, then looking at Peter, now stationed at the fluorescent orange (red?) couch. 

A little while passed until there was a knock on the door. 

“It’s unlocked,” Jess called. 

Just as she expected a worried woman walked in, holding a fancy purse and blatant hair extensions. 

“Let me guess, your husband is missing, it's nothing like him, he’s very strict with his schedule and you’re worried,” Jess said. The woman opened her mouth to speak, only to be cut off with Jess’s right hand hitting the desk. 

“He’s cheating on you, it’s probably a secretary.” 

The woman scoffed, “I know that! He’d at least be home by now.” 

“So, can you find him?” The lady asked 

“For a price,” Jess answered blandly. 

“I’ll pay after you find him.” the woman smugly explained. 

Jess sighed, sneaking a glance at the bookshelf again. She looked back up to the tousled and arrogant woman. “Yeah, I’ll take it.” 

She didn’t bother staying in reality too see the woman leave, but she was snapped out of her open eye slumber by Peter standing next to the desk. 

“Hey Peter.” she stood up, grabbing a bottle and pouring some in the glass next to her computer. 

“So, how are you going to find him?” he asks slightly leaning on the wood desk

“I thought you were playing, uh fortnight or something.” Jess sighed. 

Peter visibly cringed at the word. “No, I was sketching ideas for a vessel to hold my AI code. After I finished my homework of course.” he finished, smiling. 

Jess sighed, “I have no idea what that means.” 

The room went silent and as Peter was moving away from the desk. shame, was it shame? Sat itself in the core of Jess’s jest, threatening to pull her down to her bed to sleep however long it would need for this feeling to go away. 

“First I’ll search social media, she gave me a picture so I know who to track.” 

Peter turned back with a small smile, prompting Jess to take a drink. 

“What if he doesn’t have social media? someone who cheats doesn’t usually post who they’re with.” Peter asks and prompts. 

“yes, but old people like to post their locations with a picture, maybe on Facebook. If we’re lucky, Instagram.” jess answers. 

Peter cocks his head “What next.” 

“I go to the place, ask around. Follow the trail.” she finished, taking another big gulp of cheap whiskey though Peter's concern. 

“That’s it?” Peter asked. 

Jess nodded, “what else were you expecting?” 

Peter just shrugged. 

* * *

The wind whipped past peters’ ears, anxiety sitting in peters chest, a slim, compact spring-loaded knife cradled in his gloved hands. 

_ First I’ll search social media, she gave me a picture so I know who to track. _

_ I go to the place, ask around. Follow the trail _

The bar he visited was disgusting, chalkboards above the counter reading off people’s names and information. He set his sights on one man, sitting in the back. Peter stationed himself by the door, waiting until he’d walk out. 

_ If he could hear people’s heartbeats, then he couldn’t be there in person to tell him.  _

_ “Hey, I’m gonna be staying at Neds for the night, we’ve got way too much homework to work on alone.”  _

The man left the Bar, 30 silent minutes of watching the revolting creature drink and eat like he’d done nothing wrong. Like he hadn’t torn a piece of peters’ happiness away from him. 

Peter shoved his scarf up to his nose, testing the weight of the knife in his hand. 

Something deep tore through his chest, blinding rage clouding his vision in a sea of red. He followed the man, too drunk to register the other pair of footsteps behind him. 

Only the sharp, metallic sound of the knife slipping out from its cover attracted the man’s gaze. A strip of moonlight glinted off the knife, creating a sliver of light on an otherwise shadow shrouded figure. 

This man was the scum of the earth, the lowest of lows, sliding down the ally with the disgusting reek of urine in the air. Good, the man was scared. 

“What the hell man!” 

Peter didn’t register it, simply leaning down to match his eyes, bringing the knife up to Flint Marcos’s throat.

_ What the hell? Why am I doing this? If by killing this man, who’s no doubt killed before, how are you any better than him? If he deserves the worst punishment, then he should be in jail rotting, what would happen if he was dead? He’d get no justice.  _

If Peter let him go, then some other family would be torn apart.

_ Why am I to guess? What if this man has a family? _

Peter shook his head, what a repulsive fucking man. He should die. Shouldn’t he? 

_ Let. him. Go. _

The anger returned, flooding his brain and blocking out his senses. He could hear bones crack, blood spattering the brick behind him. His knuckles split open as he missed punches, some landing on the man’s already ruptured nose and eyebrows, some hitting the wall in a blind rage. 

If he wasn’t allowed to kill him, he was allowed to make him feel regret. 

“Kill again, I’ll know.” he gasped out before the man's head hit the concrete in a show of blood. 

Peter staggered out of the hallway, gloves, and knife forgotten with the man's unconscious body. 

He walked, zoning out as everything came to a stop, sitting down on a park bench. 

“Rough night?” 

Peter shot up, turning to face a Woman. 

Her hair was brown, and falling onto the shoulders of her clean, white dress suit. She spoke with a prominent accent and carried herself with importance. 

Peter sighed and slumped over, putting his head in his hands, grimacing at his split skin weaving itself back together. 

“I, yeah.” 

The woman nodded, “I see that,” She said with a twinge of amusement. It made Peter huff out a grin. 

“Care to tell a bored old lady?” She asked. 

Peter rolled his eyes and stood a bit straighter, the woman wasn’t old at all, maybe about her mid-thirties. “I thought I wanted something, wanted to carry out a plan, but it wasn’t right. Now I just, I just hope I didn’t do the wrong thing.” 

She looked at him with understanding in her eyes. “I see, I once thought I wanted something. When I changed plans, I realized, maybe I really did want it. That it wasn’t a bad choice, I just wasn’t ready for the consequences.” 

Peter frowned, the Woman’s words rang true. 

“I’m Peter.” he waved. 

The woman smiled. 

“My name’s Vanessa.” 

Peter felt so relaxed, he legs the tension out of his shoulders as he tried to ask. “So what brings you out here?” 

Vanessa sighed and folded her hands in her lap. 

_ “Well, I suppose I just miss my husband.”  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well? did you like it? let me know.


	6. Enter Harry Ozborn, and enter an idea

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter makes another friend, but is this one safe?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man, I just wanted Harry in this already. also look out for next chapter.

Deep breaths, breathe in, breathe out. It was a simple formula. None of that holds your breath for 7 seconds of bullshit. Peter calmed himself before walking out of his room, He'd gotten back at an absurd hour in the night. But luck was on his side when Matt turned out to not be there at all.

He already got dressed, tossing his old clothes with the dirty ones, just wanting to purge the smell of copper. Vanessa had kept him company into the odd hours, pointing out his dirty clothes.

As he opened the door, walking into the room, he furrowed his eyebrows at Matt enjoying coffee near the counter. If he knew Peter went out then he didn't say anything. 

They sat in silence, cold and dead. Peter fiddled with his phone, looking down at his hands, feeling the longing for some mark of last night to be there, that it wasn't just some fever dream.

Peter debated asking where Matt was, he could frame it like he stayed up late. But Matt could counter, ask him the same question, then what would he say? 

He backed up, grabbed his backpack, and walked out. Peter could hear Matt exhale, and he shivered.

"Be safe," Matt said as Peter walked out. 

Peter breathed in, noticing his scarred knuckles clutching his backpack strap. "Thanks," he said with a little grin

* * *

School seemed boring, he itched for some form of release, his anger clawing up and dragging out his pencil. His notebook was filled with scratches. The smell of graphite fought through every other smell in the school. He blocked everything out, even Ned's heartbeat. 

He looked around the lunchroom, gasping through angry breaths, at his table. Ned continued to hold his hands through Peter's rage. 

"Peter," he gasped.

Peter tilted his head taking deep breaths. 

"Your hands," Ned whispered. 

Peter subverted his gaze, looking towards the ground. "Ignore it," 

They sat in silence for a while, before Peter took his hands away, pulling his gaze from the scaring. 

"Can I sit here?"

Peter looked up, meeting brown eyes. The boy was taller than him, had a squarish jaw, and a nice pressed green shirt half-tucked into his jeans.

"Go ahead!" Ned said, holding his thumbs up

The boy sat down, casting his lunch tray aside. 

"I'm Harry."

"I’m Ned! And this is peter." He pointed to Peter, who Harry sat next to. Peter shrugged and waved lips pulled in an awkward half-smile. 

Harry's eyes glazed over Peter's very existence. 

"Sup." 

Peter thought they were gonna get along just fine.

*

Harry and Peter hung out for a lot, and when they were not hanging out, then they were texting  _ a lot _ . 

Peter sat next to harry on the roof of Matt's apartment, peter sent a quick text to jess, 'at Matt's apt, with Harry' 

"Have you ever made a pipe bomb?" Harry said.

Peter looked up from his sketchbook and phone, "no, still focused on my AI." He said tapping the eraser on his lip.

"We should make a bomb," Harry said, falling back.

Peter grinned, "maybe" 

This is a bad idea, this is really bad, Peter thought. 

“Wait what are we supposed to do?” Peter asked, laying his sketchbook on the junkyard ground. 

“Put the shit in the pipe and light the fuse.” harry shrugged with a smirk 

“Are you sure about this? I mean what am I supposed to say when Matt comes home and I’m not there?” Peter asked, shutting the book. 

“Nothing, what do you have to owe him? It’s not like he raised you.” 

Something tore through his chest over that night, he pushed through it, the rippling spiral of heat that caressed every inch of peters’ soul. The bomb exploded, and it sent shrapnel everywhere, it hit Peter the most. 

When he pulled his hand from his eyebrow, he smiled. The adrenaline and dopamines flooded his system, when he looked into the grinning eyes of Harry, all he could do was smile back. 

Peter and Harry came tumbling into Matt's apartment like a tornado. 

"Where's your dad?" Harry whispered against Peter's shoulder. 

"Out, I don't know, don't care." He grinned

Harry returned it, jokingly throwing Peter on the couch. "I think we smell like smoke" 

"That's what happens when you blow something up Harry." Peter laughed. 

"I think shrapnel hit you." Harry hummed, brushing his hand over Peter's eyebrows. 

Peter just shrugged, "I don't mind."

"You a masochist or something?" Harry asked. 

"No, but I have no problem with the pain."

"Is that, why?" Harry mumbled, running over the faint scarring on Peter's knuckles.

"I like the scars," Peter whispered, confessing.

Harry tilted his head, brown hair falling on ash stained skin. 

"When I look at it. It's comforting, tells me where I've been. I hate when they go away, I always think I need more." He says in hushed tones. 

"Oh," Harry replied, flopping onto the couch next to peter. "I think they look cool, and if you want more scars then, I’d say go for it." He shrugged. 

"Really?" Peter asked.

"I mean it's not, like, physiology hurting you?" He paused to see Peter shake his head. It wasn't hurting him, right? It made him feel good, like he was alive, like he was back in the alleyway, like something in him hushed at the pain, at the sight of blood. "then I don't see the problem." Harry finished. 

Peter smiled, turned over, and barely winced at the metal digging into his eyebrow.

"You really care about me." 

Above the teens, Matt peered from the fire escape, and he shuddered.

* * *

Matt was on the outside looking in, he didn’t know how to talk to Peter, to tell him what things would hurt him in the long run. He felt useless, he felt like nothing. 

Jess kept a close eye on Harry Ozborn, she dug everything she could on his family. 

Everything she shared with Matt. 

They sat in Jesse's apartment, on the couch over a drink. And Matt stressed. He shoved his hands through tangled and matted hair. Jess just pushed forwards. 

They both knew something was going on with Peter, he seemed withdrawn and cold. He hadn’t been the most bubbly but he could hold conversations, (albeit not very well.) 

“Could be the stress.” Jess tried to shrug off. “Having to go to different apartments just to see us, maybe he spends time with Harry to forget he ever lost anyone.” She speculated. 

Matt nodded into his glass. “I don’t know what to do, or how to comfort him, and it’s not like we can ask any of the parkers. We know he likes old movies and tech but we don’t know anything about that.” he blinked something out of his eye. 

“Maybe we could find someone who does? Maybe just someone smart like him.” Jess asked. Matts head tilted, “know someone?” 

“Yeah, the guy who makes my suits.” He nodded. 

Jess topped off her drink “What? You want that kid next to that side of your life? Asshole doesn’t even know who you are.” Jess rejected. 

“He’s not an asshole.” 

“I mean the suit guy dip-shit.” she rolled her eyes. 

“If I could say I knew him from college to Peter, then it would seem so bad.” Matt tried. 

“And the chances of him believing any of that crap? Here I’ll answer for you, zero.” she pulled one leg up to her torso to rest her arm on it. “There’s no way we can get something believable, for a suit guy or for Peter. Not while keeping your identity secret.” 

Matt bent his head down and took a gulp. Stewing on Jesses’ words for a while. 

“Kid I adopted, boom,” he said topping off his drink. 

“Close to the truth, but it’ll work for him. And Peter's excuse?” She asked. 

“Wanted to get him to see someone who likes the same interest, a mentor. That’s what he needs, and we can't be that right now. I can tell he feels alone and angry.” Matt finished. 

“Alright-” Jess said, getting up and grabbing Matt's empty glass, “I’ll drink to that,” she said, moving back to refill their drinks. 

“You’ll drink to anything,” Matt said, grinning with wit. 

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Melvin, I adore him, he deserves time in fanfics.   
> didja like it? let me know!


	7. return: Vannessa fisk and the 'saving' of a mentaly unstable teen, ft. Melvin potter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> despite the people around him, Peter feeling he's running out of time, realizes he can't rely on anyone but himself, or is there someone else?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sometimes I stare at iron-dad, and everybody wanting to give Peter a mentor in mechanics. well, surprise! its melvin.  
> I hope ya'll like the reappearance of Mrs.Fisk who oh boy sees a little bit of Fisk in Peter.  
> ya'll decide is that's a good thing or not.

Rooftops seemed magical with Harry by his side. The air was threaded with laughter and jokes. And no matter what he did, it’s like it never affected Harry’s vision of him. It’s like he could tell him anything, he told him everything. And when the tears washed his face in a sea of feelings, in guilt. When he smiled at Harry and said  _ ‘I don't feel bad, I never will.’  _

Harry laughed and said, _ ‘why would you?’ _ . 

He was loose-lipped and happy. It seemed like his problems were gone, he just blanked. It felt warm, and that thing, that damn anger that’s been fighting against his very being, curled up and rested. 

_ ‘I like spiders,’ _ Peter smiled, resting his head in Harry’s lap, the warmth spread across as Harry pet his head. Was all this light, all this warmth coming from Harry?  _ ‘I don’t care if one bit me, it's like my motif you know?’  _

_ ‘I'm gonna surprise you with something someday.’  _ Harry smiled. 

_ ‘Should I be nervous?’  _

  
  


* * *

“You told him about me?” Peter asked, throwing his hoodie up to protect from the cold of the green gray-tinted streets 

Matt nodded briskly “Yeah, I figured I'd take you to someone who knows tech and building better than I do,” he shoved his hands in his black hoodie.

“Oh, okay.” 

He quieted himself as they approached the garage door, slowly bit by bit after Matts harsh knocking, the door opened. A figure backlit becoming visible. 

His name was Melvin, and he was  _ awesome _ . He was a bit rambly and seemed awkward to meet new people so he settled for a hand wave and a polite smile as he was introduced. 

He didn’t call Matt by his name when he dropped him off, and that was  _ shady as fuck.  _

In fact, Melvin didn’t refer to Matt by any name at all, but he did call Peter Little Devil. Peter would smile and welcome the feeling of comfort. 

He had blueprints of weapons, of layers of armor so thin it just looked like normal fabric. He’d look at what Melvin was working on and with excitement, he’d ramble about the thing he’d just made, and with exited eyes peter would listen, jumping in with small ideas and questions. Melvin was all too happy, sometimes he’d talk a little about someone named Betsy, peter would smile and think of harry. When Melvin had mentioned doing things to keep her safe- just how much he would do. Peter nodded with understanding. 

Time spent with Melvin was good- they worked in sync. And when Peter couldn’t hide the exited or happy flapping of his hands, melvin just smiled and said he did a similar thing.  __ But time spent with Melvin cut off time with Harry, which cut off time for homework, which cut of time with getting to know his parents-  _ why wasn’t there enough time? _

  
  


Peter grimaced on his bed- he needed advice he needed someone to talk too. The time read two am. Matt would be asleep- but that’s okay, he rationalized. _ I need help, its okay to ask for it. _ He opened his door. And pushed to slide Matt’s open as well. The room smelled faint, and he couldn’t make out a lump in the sheets. It was only when he fell onto the bare mattress, that he noticed Matt wasn’t there. 

Peter twisted his hand in the sheets and muffled a yell into the mattress tears pricking his eyes and frustration building. 

He hit the mattress, willing his tears not to drop. But it wasn’t enough, ‘ _ I need to hit something  _ _ hard _ _ ’ _ he cursed pushing himself up. He stood there with his phone in his scarred hands and tried to take a deep breath in through the anger. 

‘ _ He wasn’t there when I needed him, he won’t ever be. You dont have Ben and you dont have May. and you dont have any more time.’ _ the thought to himself. Just when a thought pricked the corner of his mind and reminded him there was one more guardian to call. It went straight to voicemail, jess had failed him too. ‘ _ No, they didnt fail you, you’re just to much to handle. You ask too much of them.’  _

Out in the biting streets, he cursed to himself. Out like this alone, out of time- his breath sped up. There was one more, one last one that his heavy panicked brain could find, one person who’d seen him at his worst and only his worse, no expectations. Just a number. 

_ “I hate feeling like this,” he muttered, the lady’s eyes softened and her accented voice asked for his phone. With shaking hands, he passed it. Vannessa, the contact had now read. _

Vanessa, the lady in white who had seen him with bloody fists and shaking with rage and exhaustion. A manic laugh pushed through as he clicked call, his hazy brain thinking her an angel as the phone rang.  _ The lady in white _ . He laughed again, tears now freely falling. The building anger never ceasing. 

“Hello?” 

That was her, peter let out a sigh of relief. Choking on his tears “i-” his voice came out raspy and full of emotion. “I don’t have much time.” he held back a shout in his words, panicked and angry. 

“It’s you, the boy from weeks ago.” her tone came in soft with worry and eased through peters manic pacing in the entrance of the alley. “Where are you?” she asked again, probing. 

“I dont know !” he shouted standing still. He really didnt know where he was, it only hit him that moment, how much he’d been running, how far away from the apartment he was. At that he huffed. “AUGH!” he shouted, holding back more yells. Quaking in anger he slammed his head on the brick and cement. Holding all of it back, he felt a flood, everything was going over, he didnt know where he was, or what time it was. 

‘Where am I!’ ‘how much time do I have left!” tears streamed down his face and he shouted again. The phone dropping with a thud. 

Thudding pounded through peters brain, his cold body was shivering and moving, shaking in the cold, because it was cold where he was. Where he is? Where- more pounding and the feeling of cold brick hitting every inch of his body. His gaze shivered, glitches on a screen. Of his socked feet, of the brick in front of him. The brick that was in front of him? He was facing a wall? In the streets? It didnt feel like it, his shaking brain registered that nothing. Nothing felt like it, nothing he touched. Because, he thinks, _ he isnt there.  _

There’s a car, the screeching of speeding wheels pulling to a stop makes Peters shaking body freeze in terror. 

“Peter?” 

His eyes focused in and out like a camera. Slowing coming to view were his hands. Raising to be seen, his palms were red and aggravated, a slow stinging came from the back of his hands, he didn’t dare turn them around. Instead, he focused on who had called his name. Because he is peter parker. He reminds himself. He thinks vaguely, maybe it’s okay that he doesn’t know where he is. Maybe it’s okay that he doesn’t know what time it is. 

“Peter?” 

Interrupted to his thoughts, he zooms back in on the woman whos lifted calm voice had asked his name. It was Vanessa, he registered. Short hair in shades of brown falling from the middle part onto her pale face. He movies his eyes from hers and looked a little down. She seemed dressed down. In  _ heh _ , peter thought. Pausing his brain for the small chuckle. A white sweater, and white slacks. He thinks for a worrying moment if that white had ever been stained. 

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh boy, after a few months, inspiration struck.
> 
> did ya like it? tell me in the comments!

**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoyed it, more coming soon.
> 
> follow my twitter and Tumblr:  
> https://71teenidles.tumblr.com/


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